The other day, I found myself getting a bit frustrated. I was standing at the sink, trying to get some hot water to wash my face. It was early in the morning and I was having trouble discerning which knob should be turned to get the water to run hot. It didn’t seem to matter which knob I turned, both were cold. This caused me to question for a moment as to whether or not I had paid the water bill, because I happen to know that if you don’t pay your water bill, they shut off your water. And if they shut your water off, you can’t get hot water.

“But wait,” I thought! “If they turn off the water, you can’t get cold water either.” And I had more than enough cold water. What I was in short supply of was hot water! Just as I was trying to contort my mind around these complicated concepts, my wife walked in and inquired of my quandary. After explaining my situation, my wife suggested that the problem might be with the hot water heater because she had observed water in the water heater closet earlier. I asked her if that water was hot. I was met with a rather cold stare (I’m guessing she didn’t know).

If you have never tried to change out a hot water heater . . . . don’t. As adventurous as it sounds, it isn’t. I knew enough to know my first item of business. I needed to get to the hardware store and purchase a couple of manly looking wrenches and a new water heater.
The first thing out of the salesman’s mouth was “How many gallons does your old water heater hold?” I told him I’d be right back. When I returned to the store, I was prepared. I had written down all the pertinent information, including the color. Having purchased appliances before, I knew the importance of choosing the right color water heater (ours was a kind of dusty white with a bit of graying near the bottom and several rust colored globules on the pipes leading into and out of the heater).

I was rather surprised to find out that the store, which had a wide selection of water heaters, did not carry any color other than white. I was beginning to question whether or not I had chosen the right store. Then the salesman asked me how many BTU’s I preferred. I asked him, “What’s a BTU?”

“British Thermal Units,” he replied.

I told him I was American and proud of it!

I finally got home with my new water heater and carefully maneuvered it into the house, proudly standing it in the middle of the living room. Next, I took my brand new, manly looking wrenches and began disconnecting the pipes from the water heater (taking extreme care as to not scratch my new wrenches). After a few minutes of loosening connections, it occurred to me that it would be prudent to go out to the front yard and turn off the water. I came back inside and changed into some dry clothes and returned to water heater closet. It was at this point, that I wondered to myself, “Why don’t these things come with instructions?” Then, I looked over at a clear plastic packet with some sort of pamphlets inside (Optional equipment brochures, no doubt).

I guess it’s worse with us guys. We hate reading instructions and/or asking for directions. However, if we did read the instructions, we’d probably scare ourselves into calling a professional . . . and that just wouldn’t do! So, after he arrived, I asked my plumber why more guys don’t read the instructions. He just shrugged, picked up a manly looking wrench and began taking my broken pipe apart.
I asked my plumber if he was a Christian and he replied, “Yeah,” but then added that he never reads the Bible, though. He said he didn’t need instructions either.

I wish my plumber would learn the he needs instructions as much as anybody else. I went out to change the brakes on my car and ponder his situation. “There’s a sermon in this somewhere!”